Things that Scare Me: A Halloween Letter to My Daughters

Dear Daughters,

There are many things that scare me and many of these will be metaphorically represented in the Halloween costumes that will cross our paths tonight as we trick-or-treat.  So as we prepare to slip into holiday garb and embark on a candy-collecting adventure, here are a few thoughts that are on my mind.

It scares me that we will in a society in which one in four women will be victims of domestic violence in their lifetimes (and that one in five women will be sexually assaulted). It scares me more that we live in a society in which people can find such abuse funny (and even costume worthy):

                                                         

It scares me we live in a world where 30 percent of clothing and toy options for girls contribute to the their sexualization.  It scares me even more the ways in which even the more innocuous children’s products can be turned sexual: 

It scares me that we live in a culture in which strong female role models are short lived.  It scares me even more that the celebrities that receive the most attention are the ones that we should be ignoring:

                      

                                   

It scares me that even in the 21^st century, we invite children to prescribe to incredibly gendered roles.  It scares me more that these early life lessons will linger years later and have long-lasting impacts.

                  

 

             It scares me that in our country women still only make 70 percent of what their male colleagues in similar fields do.  It scares me more that when women break through these barriers their success finds them branded as aggressive witches/bitches:

                    

It scares me that tonight I will hold your hands as you cross streets, encounter strangers, and approach foreign thresholds, but that I will not always be there as your companion, your guide, and your protector.  It scares me that with each passing Halloween I will be watching you both move further into a world of uncertainty, challenges, and danger. 

But, for tonight at least, I can watch the two of you skip down cold streets blissfully unaware of the many things that scare me.  And I can enthusiastically point out any passing girl dressed as a doctor, athlete, or pirate, choosing to reveal in the things that give make me hope… rather than fear.

Love,

Your Mother